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The best way to avoid divorce and make sure your marriage gets back to being a healthy one, is to find out what is wrong with it and then take the necessary steps to fix it.
Little things can often come between a couple. One partner thinks they are being nice while their behavior offends the other one. As an example, a husband might take on a certain home improvement to surprise his wife, and she gets upset because she was not involved in picking out the materials.
It's not that anyone's wrong in this situation - the husband is right for making an effort to do something nice, and the wife is right for wanting to be consulted about a permanent change in the decor of the house.
The only thing missing here is a healthy level of communication. Very often couples don't even discuss such small issues. Rather than saying anything they vow to take revenge. "How dares he replace my beloved dishes with these monstrosities? He will find out when I get rid of his recliner and replace it with the new chair I've fallen in love with."
If you think a lot of little things have combined to bring your marriage to its demise, maybe it is time for you to start considering your spouse's needs a little. Try to get them involved in the decision making, rather than always asking them to adjust to what you like.
Show them that their input is important to you. Make them feel like their happiness is important to you, and they will do the same for you.
Make an attempt to do things they want to do that they know you'd rather not do. For instance, if you hate sitting in the hot sun at a baseball game, you don't have to go all of the time, but surprise him by buying tickets to one game and making a night of it - with a smile on your face.
Compromising can truly save a relationship. No approach works for everybody. Give it your best shot, and pat yourself in the back for trying when at least 50% of other couples simply give up.
Ego often gets in the way, and we are more worried about being right than being happy. After all, it only means that you are doing your best to honor your vows to love and cherish the person you promised your life to.
Little things can often come between a couple. One partner thinks they are being nice while their behavior offends the other one. As an example, a husband might take on a certain home improvement to surprise his wife, and she gets upset because she was not involved in picking out the materials.
It's not that anyone's wrong in this situation - the husband is right for making an effort to do something nice, and the wife is right for wanting to be consulted about a permanent change in the decor of the house.
The only thing missing here is a healthy level of communication. Very often couples don't even discuss such small issues. Rather than saying anything they vow to take revenge. "How dares he replace my beloved dishes with these monstrosities? He will find out when I get rid of his recliner and replace it with the new chair I've fallen in love with."
If you think a lot of little things have combined to bring your marriage to its demise, maybe it is time for you to start considering your spouse's needs a little. Try to get them involved in the decision making, rather than always asking them to adjust to what you like.
Show them that their input is important to you. Make them feel like their happiness is important to you, and they will do the same for you.
Make an attempt to do things they want to do that they know you'd rather not do. For instance, if you hate sitting in the hot sun at a baseball game, you don't have to go all of the time, but surprise him by buying tickets to one game and making a night of it - with a smile on your face.
Compromising can truly save a relationship. No approach works for everybody. Give it your best shot, and pat yourself in the back for trying when at least 50% of other couples simply give up.
Ego often gets in the way, and we are more worried about being right than being happy. After all, it only means that you are doing your best to honor your vows to love and cherish the person you promised your life to.
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